So the weather here was quite "balmy" compared to the -19°C weather we've been having lately, with the wind chill.
Most of you know that we got a new puppy two weeks ago. What most of you probably don't know is that said puppy poops. A lot. I mean, a lot a lot, and only if I go outside with her and encourage her.
I can only imagine what I sound like to the neighbours.
Me: "C'mon hon, hurry up, pee pee poo poo. Hurry up." (I am all shrill and excited and super-happy sounding)
Puppy: *tilts head.... runs back to back door*
Me: "C'mon puppy, hurry up, pee pee poo poo. Hurry up. Go pee pee."
Puppy: *drops and gives me a 3-second pee*
Me: "Yay! Good pee pee, good girl! Good pee pee! okay, hurry up, go poo poo."
Puppy: *runs around yard, eats bunny poop, smears it on my fingernails as I try to sweep her mouth, dives under the patio table*
Wash, rinse, repeat.
You get the idea.
Sort of. With less snow in your eyeballs/eardrums/nostrils and chills up your spine.
So, after two weeks of laziness and general disdain of all temperatures cold and colder, I realized the multiple poops (that were followed with loud cheers by me and congratulatory messages to the puppy) were starting to really pile up.
So out I went today to start to shovel them into a bag for garbage night. Let's just say at the best of times, this stuff isn't solid, as we changed her food. So add in snow melt, paw squishes, and other lovely-dog-poop-related joy, and you've got yourself a shifty substance.
IF YOU HAVE RECENTLY EATEN, OR ARE ABOUT TO EAT, YOU MAY WANT TO SHUT THIS BROWSER WINDOW RIGHT ABOUT NOW....
SERIOUSLY
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
THIS ISN'T GOING TO END WELL.
ALRIGHT, BUDDY, I WARNED YOU.
I was dealing with something between 10 and 60 on the scale below. Moundfuls and moundfuls (no, not mouthfuls).
So... yeah. The garbage man tomorrow is going to have a melty-slushy-soupy mess. And the backyard doesn't look much better.
Why do I blog about dog poop so much? Who knows?
How long until someone finds my blog because they will inexplicably search google with that exact phrase? I give it two weeks.
Who has to deal with the aftermath tomorrow morning? The garbage collection man.
Poor garbage collection man.
_____________
Pin It Now!
Most of you know that we got a new puppy two weeks ago. What most of you probably don't know is that said puppy poops. A lot. I mean, a lot a lot, and only if I go outside with her and encourage her.
I can only imagine what I sound like to the neighbours.
Me: "C'mon hon, hurry up, pee pee poo poo. Hurry up." (I am all shrill and excited and super-happy sounding)
Puppy: *tilts head.... runs back to back door*
Me: "C'mon puppy, hurry up, pee pee poo poo. Hurry up. Go pee pee."
Puppy: *drops and gives me a 3-second pee*
Me: "Yay! Good pee pee, good girl! Good pee pee! okay, hurry up, go poo poo."
Puppy: *runs around yard, eats bunny poop, smears it on my fingernails as I try to sweep her mouth, dives under the patio table*
Wash, rinse, repeat.
You get the idea.
Sort of. With less snow in your eyeballs/eardrums/nostrils and chills up your spine.
So, after two weeks of laziness and general disdain of all temperatures cold and colder, I realized the multiple poops (that were followed with loud cheers by me and congratulatory messages to the puppy) were starting to really pile up.
So out I went today to start to shovel them into a bag for garbage night. Let's just say at the best of times, this stuff isn't solid, as we changed her food. So add in snow melt, paw squishes, and other lovely-dog-poop-related joy, and you've got yourself a shifty substance.
IF YOU HAVE RECENTLY EATEN, OR ARE ABOUT TO EAT, YOU MAY WANT TO SHUT THIS BROWSER WINDOW RIGHT ABOUT NOW....
SERIOUSLY
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
THIS ISN'T GOING TO END WELL.
ALRIGHT, BUDDY, I WARNED YOU.
I was dealing with something between 10 and 60 on the scale below. Moundfuls and moundfuls (no, not mouthfuls).
 |
| This is why I don't like tootsie rolls. (Image source here, 'cause someone else blogs about crap, too.) |
So... yeah. The garbage man tomorrow is going to have a melty-slushy-soupy mess. And the backyard doesn't look much better.
 |
| Oscar's shit-eating grin is about to become a whole lot more appropriate.... |
Why do I blog about dog poop so much? Who knows?
How long until someone finds my blog because they will inexplicably search google with that exact phrase? I give it two weeks.
Who has to deal with the aftermath tomorrow morning? The garbage collection man.
Poor garbage collection man.
_____________