Monday, November 8, 2010

Blogger... You Piss Me Off

Reasons Blogger pisses me off? There are lots. Also? I have realized I hate a lot of things (outside of Blogger).

Also? I am copying jess’ writing style. Obviously.

  1. If I said "I don't want any chocolate", you would check for fever and perhaps institutionalize me. If I said "I don't want squid", then I would assume you would listen to me and not give me squid. When Blogger asks me and I say "Don't track my page views" I would assume that would hold true. I click on a link to review. Goddamn page hit counts in the counter. I said DON'T track!
  2. This is check-able by reviewing which post was being looked at. Thanks Blogger. Thanks for counting me in my stats. I am my biggest obsessed fucking fan so now I am messing with my own stats.
  3. If I am in the comments box, replying to my awesome readers, and accidentally click their name when copying or scrolling (what, I am clutsy and have a Great Dane who pokes my arms while I type), I lose my entire damn comment while going to their profile page. Can't you temp-autosave my comment, too? Let the back button work and magically have text re-appear?
  4. Why are the widgets so damn big? The text is so freakin' huge. I am mildly retarded and unable to modify this. I am also too cheap to pay someone to design this site (because no one cares about it THAT much). Let me RESIZE, mahfackkars.
  5. I blame you for my inability to write code, or use more than bold or italics tags in html. I blame you for my lack of funny content. I blame you for my lack of legions of followers. I also blame you for my recent weight gain, my lack of good photo editing software, and this funny rash on my chin.
  6. Also, what's this rumour I hear about you and weapons of mass destruction. Hmmmm? 
  7. EDIT - I also hate your word "captchas". I feel like I am elderly and going blind while tripping on acid. Seriously... is the warped text really going to trick "spammers"? Prevent auto-word-captcha-filling? On this little blog? Whatever. I disabled that shit. Unless a person has a load of followers and is spammed hardcore, who needs that word verification shit? Hmmmm? HMMMMM?

    What pisses you, my fellow bloggers, off with Blogger? How do you deal?

    That is all.

    ____________________________________
    Seriously Really Seriously Blog Pin It Now!

    13 comments:

    1. most of my blogging angst is directed at myself... i'll say "i KNOW there is a way to do this... WHY can't i do it?!" but numbers 1 & 2? i TOTALLY agree!!! there are other stat counters, but can i figure out how to use them?
      of course i can't.
      also? :D xo

      ReplyDelete
    2. *jess - direct it ALL to Blogger. I have decided that anything and everything is Blogger's fault.

      Also? I linked back to your blog, forgot to do it the first time when I published.

      Finally - the other trackers are shit, too. And they have website advertising embedded in them. My counters are bullshizz.

      ReplyDelete
    3. Yeah, the stat things pisses me off too.. I find it kicks in when I look back at old entries (hell, someone might as well read them, who else is going to?), or if I switch from my home computer to my work computer.

      Not.. that I uh, even blog, or read blogs at work, I mean. *koff*

      I also wish I could match the source with the entry they found, when it's a really weird random one.

      I can't figure out how to widen my page.

      ReplyDelete
    4. I never noticed that Blogger is tracking my page views even though like you, I told it not to. Bastards. you're right about the captcha thing too.. i should disable mine too if I weren't so damn lazy.

      SD
      Simple Dude

      ReplyDelete
    5. *Yandie, Goddess of Pickles - i... uh... never read old blog posts either. This was just an - uhh - an example of what happens. Right? RIGHT?
      I found some weird search terms the other day and I am totally baffled.

      *Simple Dude - disable! Disable! (I don't mean YOU, I mean the captcha thing). It is sooooo frigging annoying. Unless you start getting spambotted.

      *carmar76 - indeed. Expletive grrrr. Everything wrong in the world is now Blogger's fault.

      ReplyDelete
    6. I don't even bother with Blogger's stats, they are so awful. I use statcounter and histats instead. Why two? I don't know, I'm odd.

      ReplyDelete
    7. Hahah, yeah.. apparently someone in the Russian Federation found me in a search engine under the search term "I said I was in craptacular"

      ReplyDelete
    8. Oh and I don't like that I can't create a preferred readers list... Some stuff I want to write and I don't necessarily want it viewable by the whole world.

      ReplyDelete
    9. My complaint is the spacing and indenting on certain posts. I tend to take a few hours to create my blog's posts (more so with the cartoons) and I've noticed that after a few hours if I press the "Enter" key to space out paragraphs, IT DOESN'T WORK.
      So, I end up sometimes with posts that have lovely indents in the first half and then scrunched no-space paragraphs in the second half.
      See what I'm talking about?
      I'm a paragraph freak and I find it easier to read if what is written has proper spacing, dammit.
      -Barb the French Bean

      ReplyDelete
    10. Since I haven't disabled that either this means I'm probably giving MYSELF half of those 20 pageviews a day. Damn. I thought I was finally gaining internet fame. :(

      Captchas are weird. I shall refer you to this picture: http://lolbot.net/pix/10833.jpg

      ReplyDelete
    11. At least once a week blogger completely deletes my reading list. I've ranted about it a few times on my own blog.

      ReplyDelete
    12. *Amy - i'd use three just to one up you (just kidding). The stats stuff is such bullshizz, why bother, eh?

      *Yandie, Goddess of Pickles - my most amusing search terms so far have been "cat toast .gif" and "his name sort of terrifies". Beats the shit out of me. The cat one was THREE times! WTH?

      I'm also shameless (well, except for the rest of my life which is heavily laden in shame) so I post anything, but that preferred readers list is a good idea.

      *Barb the French Bean - i knooooow! I forgot about that one! I hate it! If I go back to edit an older post it totally fucks it up! Infuriates me, so I end up not making the edit because it is too much work to make it format again (most times it doesn't even LET me, or acknowledge the hard return/enter key). Bastards.

      *Sarah Elizabeth - no worries, disabling it doesn't work anyway. So just ASSUME you are winning the internet. I like the illustration, but my face would show rage, not the smile the wee character shows. ;-)

      *Jumble Mash - think it's a weird conspiracy or something? Let's start a big angry mob and storm their... office? Or something? I dunno, I got nothin'.

      ReplyDelete

    I get far too excited when new comments come in here...