April Fool? Or Wii Schooled?

So yeah... Feyoncé™  and I were talking about if we had ever fallen victim to full blown April Fools Day trickery.

I recalled a hazy memory of my sister's failed attempt to cover my dad's toilet bowl with clear plastic cling wrap, but I could have dreamt it. I'm not very accurate when it comes to childhood memories. (Self-preservation, perhaps? Just kidding, Mom).

So we basically had a brief, not noteworthy conversation.

I said that I thought the trickery part of the day only went until 11am or noon or something, and Feyoncé™  thought that I was trying to trick him. I honestly thought that was true.

Anyway, turns out I got fooled on April 1st.

I turned on the Wii Fit balance board... and the goddamn thing said
"Balance... Board... Not... Working"... and I starting thinking, aw fuck shit crap darn, I don't want to have to pay to get the damn thing fixed, I wonder if there even is somewhere to get it repaired... will I have to ship it somewhere...?

And then it pops on a damn star hat and says "April Fool's!!"

This appeared word by word... effectively schooling AND pissing me off at the same time. Goddamned Wii.

So, I got jacked by a bloody children's game accessory. (After getting chin electrocuted once before... I think it's out to get me).

Then? Was supposed to visit with a friend, went out to my car in the garage, and realize I had left the trunk open for two days.

BATTERY.COMPLETELY.DEAD.

So I had no boost, no jumper cables, and no one to help me push the car out of the garage.

SO I freakin' inadvertently played an April Fools joke on myself. Awesome.

It only stung for a moment.

And yes, I realize it's mid-May.

I'm just MIA and scrounging Blogger for unfinished draft posts. Thanks Blogger!

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Win & Fail

So, sometimes I feel like the ultimate shitty blogger.
No good thoughts, no witticisms bringing the house down with lols, ROLFLOLs, or people choking on their chicken wing and dying due to my hilarious content.

I realized today that I promised to guest post at two other bloggers' sites... Bruce at JADIP and Krissy at Talkative Taurus.

I went all wedding-y and did stuff, and was sick and down and out in between, then went to California, was in hospital, came back home, now suffering nightmares and unable to sleep through the night. I never guest posted.

Full of the AWESOME.

I have also been given an award by Sam at a Redhead Named Sam, chosen at random, but have yet to make mention of it. So... I get a big helping of FAIL for that.

On the other hand?

I WIN on Wii.



I am currently ranked #1 on all of Rock Band 3 for "Blow At High Dough" by the Tragically Hip (an awesome Canadian band who never were able to crack North American mainstream). I did vocals solo on expert. Boo-yah.

The smarter it gets, the further it's gonna go. #1 on Rock Band 3

I also did 10-fucking-straight-minutes of hula hoop on the Wii fit. I'm sure I broke no records, but people. 10 MINUTES OF HULA HOOP. That has to count for something, right?

10 minute Wii hula hoop: Not for pussies the weak.

RIGHT?

Okay, so the actual number of spins is about that number divided by 5 (What?!? They throw 5 hoops at you and add it to your total... not my fault!)

No?

Goddammit.

Fine, here is an adorable picture of my sleeping puppy Ella (with me trying to protect her lady-like-ness):

Sleepy puppy with some class.

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