I ate Mozart's balls

It was my HUSBAND's idea! He's freaky like that, yo.

They were gluten-free. That was a nice surprise.

They smelled pretty good, too, which is quite a feat for the balls of a man who has been dead for 221 years.

How could I resist? Look at this face:

How seductive. Who knew that Mozzie had such bedroom eyes?

They came direct from Austria. I think. I didn't really listen to what was being said, I just started eating them with reckless abandon.

I can only imagine the number of folks who will be disappointed in this post.

Here, to make you feel better, I've included something shiny. (What?!? It always works for me!)

Come taste my balls. They have a subtle cherry flavour. No, really.

Not as amusing as Pete Schweddy balls, but it'll do, pig. It'll do. Happy Sunday.




My mouth is watering, just thinking about it.... BWAHAHAHA...
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So apparently I can make coffee even WORSE

Yeah, remember when I forgot the filter a week or two ago when attempting to make my usual morning coffee?

Well...

Today I remembered the water.

I remembered the filter.

I even used filtered water. (Did I just blow your mind?)


I was oh-so-proud of myself, despite my foggy head, raging allergies and general disdain for the morning.

The one thing I forgot?

The damned coffee.

Yep.

I made coffee without coffee grounds. And I can't even use "Monday" as an excuse. Let's just say that the colour and taste were a bit off.


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Google is making me think I am funny.

But I'm not really that funny.

My blog traffic has spiked the last few months, but it's mainly from Google Images where people are searching for sexy socks, spandex asses, and a few other search terms that shockingly (okay, maybe not so shockingly) bring them to this little ol' blog.

It's disappointing because it means that they won't stick around. They just take my photo and go.

*sigh*

Also? I decided that over the last two weeks I want to get really fit. (Stop laughing). So I've been exercising in various forms like a   madwoman  myself   myself, but with more determination and less pajamas.

*I CAN HARDLY MOVE*
I am so sore it actually hurts to type. My forearms are screaming "What the f_ck are you doing to us?!!?"

True story.

And I think my right hamstring just called in sick. 

That's all for today.

What I really want to know is if you all planted a tree on Saturday, or tipped a stripper. Inquiring minds need to know.

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