Saturday, May 7, 2011

Hard To Buy For Mom? I've Got The Perfect Mother's Day Deal For YOU!

Have you found that Mother's Day has snuck up on you somehow this year?

Tired of the old lame bourbon & cigarettes daisies and teapot go-to gifts for mom?

Well, well, let me tell you that I have found the utmost thoughtful/creative gift-giving for your mom this Mother's Day. It's elegant. It's simple. And despite what you may think of my language or taste, it will not compromise her dignity.

As you may well be aware, I am a girl that loves a good deal. I've previously written about my spa deal experience as well as my other spa deal threesome experience. Perhaps you read my Old Navy post and my irrational love of all things on sale (not in my size)?

These new deal sites like Groupon, TeamBuy, WagJag, Snaggies and DealTicker get me all warm and fuzzy in the pants. Let's say that one purchase alone saved me about $700 plus on wedding flowers.

So, needless to say, I scan these sites regularly. I found this gem. And I thought of you guys.

Oh, and of Mom, of course!

So, MOM, this one's for you:

If you can't read it, it reassures you that the new system brings "elegance", "simplicity" and "dignity" to the procedure of having a hose put up your arse.

I know you are all likely SORELY disappointed that there is a maximum of one voucher per person for the colon cleansing of your lifetime, but never fear! You CAN buy more as gifts!

Get one for mom! Gramma, too! Boss seeming a little anal-retentive lately? Gift her/him as well! Think how dignified and elegant they'll feel!

You can thank me later.

p.s. Is anyone else intrigued by the "+ More" in the spa's name?? Just me?

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  1. Bwaaahhahahhaha!!! You are a lifesaver! I hadn't bought anything for the moms yet, but now I know what to get her! And yeah, what the shit is the "+"??? Or do I even want to know?

  2. oh my heck, there are so many things to be amused by ... thanks for finding this deal!

  3. I think my mother may hurt me if I were to present that to her...

  4. And here I thought I was thoughtful by sending her flowers. If the way to my mom's heart is through her ass, I volunteer to be disowned.

  5. For the mum who has everthing. With this lovely gift she can get her plumbing cleaned AND polished (shit weaseled) all in one handy, dandy spa visit. It will be a MD she will never forget!

  6. hahahahahaha. now i'm going to have to start checking those sites for things that are *not* colon cleansings.

  7. o_O"

    Even though she doesn't eat them, I think my Mom would just prefer chocolates, thanks.


  8. Sounds like that's a gift just up

  9. My mother's attitude probably would not improve any if I had given her this for mothers day.

    Though, my father probably would have been in good spirits if I had. But he has a twisted sense of humor.

  10. um, I know they say "it's the thought that counts," but I really don't want to know WHAT someone would have to be thinking in order to buy me an enema. Honestly, a card is fine!

  11. Fuck I wish I'd seen this before Mother's Day! All I got for my mom was a urinary catheter!

  12. Dammit! I am too late. Well, socks are less expensive, anyway. You see, she really needs to put a sock in it....
    Yeah, that was bad....

  13. Yeah I know my main complain about hydrocolonics has always been the lack of elegance and dignity.

  14. @ALL - I have been MIA and computer-less for some time. Totally late to my own post, but you guys crack the shit up and outta me.

    Not as effectively as a colonic-cleansing would (I can only ASSume... HA!), but you gals and guys rock.


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