Monday, December 5, 2011

How Many Days Is Too Many Without Showering?

What's that you say?

Half a day? Especially if you go to the gym?

What if you curl up in the fetal position in bed for three days with the puppy?

So three then?

No?

1.5 days?

Does taking the garbage bin in, during wet snow, sort of count as a shower?

Oh no, you seriously don't want to stick your tongue out around me. But in all seriousness... it is a wet snow shower, right? RIGHT??!!?


Hmmmm...

I might need to rethink this "self care" business...



(This post brought to you by my self restraint to go on a tirade about Keurigs and how hard it isn't to brew a regular cup of coffee? Really? Wait... I think... I think I just ranted anyway. F_ck.)


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30 comments:

  1. For curling up in bed with the dog, you get a week. It's in the rule book.

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  2. haha to both the keurig and the showering dilemma. I don't have an issue with the showering daily...but I rocked No Shave November and now my legs are SOOO cold...they want their sweater back. haha.

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  3. If the dog is the only one you're curling up with, or seeing, a week is fine. What's the husband have to say about that?

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  4. Rule of thumb is that when you can start smelling yourself, it's too long.

    Haha!

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  5. As many days as you can go until you finally say to yourself, "damn, I'm disgusting." For me, it's three. MAX

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  6. Does the dog cringe away from you yet? No? You're FINE.

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  7. i love my keurig. we don't generally drink more than one cup of coffee a day, and none of us in the house drink coffee at the same time of day. so we never made a pot of coffee. and we just stopped drinking coffee. which, you know. sucked.

    ALSO i need to shower every day. but i don't wash my hair every day. oh, unless i'm sick. i've gone three days in bed without showering when sick. i do still brush my teeth. that's important.

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  8. I concur with SarcasminAction. Go until you can't stand yourself. Usually that's until day three or I have to leave tbe house for a public venue other than Walmart where I would likely fit right in.

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  9. @Belle - Once again, I like the way you think!

    @According to Jewels - I'm rocking the no shave for laser removal. Pretty unsightly in some regions! ;) Hope you warm up!

    @George - I might expire in a week. Husband furrows brow disappointingly from the other side of the world.

    @Ach du lieber - Uh oh....

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  10. @SarcasmInAction - Yeah, I hit that point last night. I won't tell you that I still haven't dealt with it. lol.

    @Leauxra - She does not, but she's also the type to eat faeces and seek out all things gross. So I can't really use her for measuring. ;)

    @steph gas - I need to shower every day, too. I know it. My hair looks greasy after half a day, no matter what shampoo I use. It's like I'm a greasy 14 year old. Again.

    Only I drink coffee around here, but I drink two big-ass mugs of it. Even still, it's so easy to brew two cups (and I would have to think a shit-ton cheaper with dollar store filters and regular ground coffee instead of expensive little packets?)

    I dunno...

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  11. @Ducky - There ya have it... gotta be somewhere this afternoon and most definitely can't be seen in this yoga-pant-terrifying state.

    Maybe then I can go to WalMart afterwards and not feel so bad. No? Not very nice to my fellow non-self-carers? OK.

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  12. ill have to consult the manual...but generally when i smell like a wino who is well ripe do i think hmmm maybe that bar of soap and me should get intimate again...
    not that i let myself get like that..just...you know

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  13. Oh, we have an unhealthy obsession with showering in our culture. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with going 3 days in between showers. Seriously. Your skin will thank you if you don't shower every day. I usually shower every second day, which will probably gross people out. But honestly, how dirty can I possibly get?

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  14. @Dan - See, I can't base it on wino-scented cues because that would be ALWAYS. lol.

    @Stephanie - The funny thing is, when I do shower, I take FOREVER. Unfortunately, because of my mutant-resistance to deodorant, it takes no time for me to be smelly. :)

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  15. the answer is entirely dependent on the size of your audience :)

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  16. The less you move, the longer you can go. My rule is that if I don't have to go to work and I'm not going to see Boyfriend, all bets are off. Sorry, roommate.

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  17. @Kage - A woman with a laser dangerously close to my junk.

    It's time for me to hose down. Hands down.

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  18. @Gia - I like the way you think. There was definitely limited movement. Yoga? No thanks. Fresh air? Naw, I'm ok. Bed to kitchen? Mmmmmm, ok.

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  19. I'm planning on marrying my Keurig. One of the best inventions ever.

    As for showering? What's a shower?

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  20. I can't go even a single day without showering. I start to feel really gross.

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  21. @lisa from insignificant at best - Maybe it's jealousy over the Keurig. Or maybe cheapness. Or both.

    Trying to research this shower thing via this post. Will let you know more once I know!

    @Interwebs Fails - A new commenter! Hello! I like the way you approach it. I wonder if my dog's super sensitive nose changes the game a bit?

    @DWei - No doubt, I FEEL really gross, too. But the apathy is much stronger than the grossness, therefore... problem.

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  22. I think if all you are doing is laying in bed then three days is a perfectly acceptable time to go without showering...I mean it's not like you're working up a sweat or anything.

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  23. 2-3 days depending on the day's exertion. I mean if you're up and down stairs carrying groceries, you might want to consider it. If you're lying around being sloth-like, be as anti-shower as you can stand.

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  24. @Paula - But we know I sweat like a fiend and usually laying around causes MORE stink. It's like the apathy oozes from the pores. lol.

    @Michael - See above. lol. Groceries would mean leaving the house... which would mean showering! ;)

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  25. Showering is so situational. I go out bush for four days and generally don't start to feel filthy until I hit civilisation (hell, if walking into a McDONALDS makes you feel like the smelliest, most dirt-encrusted person there, you know you have a problem and need a hot tub to soak in).

    I understand about the coffee... but then I ALWAYS approach unknown baristas/coffee with apprehension and low expectations. More things than you think go into the perfect espresso, let alone having a barista who doesn't f*ck up the milk...

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  26. PFFT!!!

    In the 1600's people bathed once a decade, and they survived. Of course, they also had that whole bubonic plague thing going, hmmm...

    Try hand sanitizer. It's not just for hands anymore!

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  27. @bekkitae - I most certainly would have put all the other bums in McDonalds to shame. Also? How does the milk situation work for those brewers? The machine at work uses powdered synthetic stuff that comes in a packet. Gross.

    @Tom G. - So if I just say I'm "retro"... or "Victorian"... or "Elizabethan" or something, then that should suffice, right?

    Oooh, how the sanitizer would sting!

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  28. I take two or three showers a day so if you want to skip a day here and there it will probably balance out. You're welcome.
    +followed

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  29. @Elliot MacLeod-Michael - Oh my goodness, I could only imagine raw skin! You must be an athlete! Nice to know things are practically even now.

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting! Quite the interesting first post to read. lol.

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