Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Checking In: Death Addition

Hey Y'all.

I am writing to you in the most upright position I have been in, in 13 hours. I have severe stomach pain and all kinds of other GI and feverish symptoms... not sure if it is a flu bug, or if death is upon me.

(It could really go either way at this point).



Here's a post for y'all:

Things that I suck at:

- Not obsessing over things
- Travelling
- Going through airport security. No, really.
- Sports in general
- Cleaning the house
- Boggle, as of late

Things that I kick ass at:


- Finding a good deal, even if I drive myself crazy doing so
- Finding a wedding dress for a good price (which is really just repetition of point #1)

Okay..

Um.

Things that I suck at:

- Compiling lists of things that I kick ass at, that do not involve finding good deals
- Assessing my true self worth
- Finding non-food-poisoning-inducing restaurants to eat at
- Avoiding wheat and the subsequent discomfort/nausea/bloating/pain
- Avoiding sugar


Ooooh, so actually...


Things that I kick ass at:


- Eating forbidden and detrimental foods such as wheat
- Eating sugar (in any, and all, available forms)
- Eating
- Stress eating
- Drinking
- Drinking alcohol


Which reminds me....

Things that I suck at:

- Recovering from drinking in general
- Recovering from a hangover
- Recovering from an injury
- Recovery
- Keeping track of my boarding pass and passport at any given time while inside an airport
- Being patient with assholes who recline their seats fully while on an airplane. (p.s., if you do it, you are an asshole too. Sorry, I love you. But really. Really??)


Things that I kick ass at:


- Using the elipsis
- Over-using commas everywhere, all the time, inappropriately and incorrectly (and loving every minute of it)
- Critiquing Feyoncé's haircuts
- Occupying myself while on an airplane (fucking terrible... thank goodness for my laptop. I thought we were almost there and realized there was still 2.5 hours to go. Who does that? Really? Seriously? Way to go, Me.)

Things that I suck at:

- Sticking to exercising regiments
- Timing eating so I don't throw up/feel like I am going to throw up and/or pass out while exercising
- Going to bed early
- Getting up early
- Picking a great/good/mediocre/watch-able movie, with any company, at any point in time.


Okay, that's enough for now.

Hope I don't die on ya.

___
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19 comments:

  1. Don't die! The world will be a bit less colour without you!

    Seriously, get better!

    I can't comment about most of the things you kick ass or suck at but I do want to comment on your self worth: From what I have seen you are a great person with your head screwed on right! You can take the most crappy situations (literally in some cases!) into something insteresting to read and comment on. regrdless of how little self worth you might or might not know about, I think you are awesome!

    ..Tom

    (And Happy Internaional Woman's day as well!)

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  2. Ohh! Poor thing! I hope you don't die too.

    Feel better!

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  3. Find some peppermint essential oil and rub it on your tummy, drink flat sprite/sierra mist, drink lots of water, a little bit at a time, and milk it for everything you can with Feyoncé. That's what I would do.

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  4. !!!!! get well quickly please!!!

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  5. The blogging world won't be the same without your hilarious posts! Please don't die on us!!!

    -Barb

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  6. Get well soon!

    I suck at most things, so don't feel bad (about that).

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  7. oh heck, you can still write a post to make me LOL while you're sickly. YOU ROCK! stay alive, please & thank you. : )

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  8. feel better soon and great post for someone who is sick you rock

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  9. Hopefully you suck at dying! Come back to us, Steph! Don't go into the light! hehehe

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  10. This is the Internet plague that won't die. A new sick blogger every week.

    Io hope you don't die! Are you dead yet? No? Keep it that way. I'm pretty sure you would suck at dying.

    Lor

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  11. THAT is a lot many lists over there...nice!

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  12. You do kick ass at beating the shizz out of this illness, and you know it. Now go make me look bad! for whining even though I only have the flu.

    Seriously, get well soon. Tough love is so not my thing :)

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  13. things you kick ass at!

    writing fucking hilarious and fun blog posts!

    kicking an illness in the nutsack!

    getting better soon!

    three more things~

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  14. Steph I hope you are getting better! It is aweful quiet around here without you!

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  15. Missing you! I hope you are starting to feel better!

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  16. I loved watching you bounce back and forth with these. It was like watching your mind work.. scary but damn funny. :) I'm so glad you hung in there for us, but it SUCKS to be sick on a trip.

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I get far too excited when new comments come in here...